Creating more happiness inside your home starts with you
Have you ever noticed how being in a different environment can totally change your mindset?
For example, let's say you're on vacation and staying at a beautiful beach resort. If you're like me, seeing the beach automatically brings on feelings of relaxation, calm and joy. Even when annoying things happen, when I'm in the right environment, I'm able to deal with them and move right back into my happy space.
On the flip side, when I'm not on vacation (um, like basically most of the year!) I find myself often getting stuck on some of the small obstacles that happen as a part of everyday life. It's not a rare occasion that my kids start fighting at 7am. Those are the mornings I am sweating and swearing because honestly how can they wake up and get on each others nerves so quickly?! I try to calmly get whatever issue they're having resolved so everyone can move on. But let's face it, most of the time it's not that simple!
Isn't it amazing how one small thing can completely throw us off and take our day in another direction? Real life includes conflict, dealing with the unexpected and knowing how to handle a difficult situation without letting it ruin your day. The key is keeping your mindset in that sweet, happy, vacation mode as much as possible.
How though? Let's start with mindfulness...
Take a look at your surroundings. Do they make you happy? Or do you feel suffocated and dying to get outta there? What is it about them that make you feel this way? One of the things I love most about being on vacation is that I don't have to do the work to keep everything clean and organized, right? The room is always clean, towels are washed and ready and there's never a pile of dirty dishes waiting for me on the kitchen counter or in the sink.
THAT, simple as it may be, makes me feel calm. No mess. No extra chaos. Knowing that, keeping up my home and maintaining a tidy environment are very important for me. It might take an extra ten minutes before I go to bed at night to clean up the last of the dishes or fold the throw blankets and put them away...but those ten minutes can change the way I'm able to face challenges the next day.
When I am surrounded by chaos, my brain and the energy i give off is chaotic. With two kids and two dogs chaos is always present so it's up to me to take the necessary action to create the calm. Because of this I have to make it a priority, for my own well being, to keep my home neat and welcoming. It needs to be a space where I can take a deep breath. A space that I find comfort in, a space where I can sit an enjoy an afternoon cup of tea...not one that I'm trying to escape.
Here are some simple tips that help me keep myself and my household in check!
1. Don't overwhelm yourself.
Start small. Keep it simple.
I'll be the first to admit that on many occasions I have decided I need to reorganize and declutter everything all at once. I've done it a million times only to find myself facing the same result - I'm frustrated, paralyzed totally overwhelmed. In my need to have less mess, when I take on ALL of it as one big chunk, I create a much bigger mess which then stresses me out like times ten! So basically the peace I attempted to create explodes in my face and then I am angry on top of frustrated, paralyzed and overwhelmed.
It's no fun being a mad mama. When I'm frustrated everyone in my house feels it. The thing I've had to remind myself of more than anything else is that my need for a tidy home isn't something I share with my husband or my kids. They don't care! It's not a priority to them. They don't hear me explaining why it's necessary to keep things a certain way...they hear me nagging about stuff that doesn't even matter to them and we all know that when we hear someone nagging we do our best to tune them out!
If you like things neat and tidy, plan for the extra 5-10 minutes to straighten up before you go to bed. Focus on the common areas in your home. You can ask your kids to help but if you already know asking them will cause a fight or an argument you're not in the mood for - just do it yourself and go to sleep with some peace of mind.
If you decide you must de-clutter, reorganize or redecorate a room, just do ONE. Start with one room and finish that one room before you move on to the next.
2. Less is more.
We've heard too many times to count - and while it's annoying it's also true.
We don't need, like really need, half the "stuff" we have. But once we have our "stuff" it's hard to get rid of it.
Best thing to do is don't bring it into your home unless you really need it. Whatever "it" is, if you truly believe it's gonna bring all the happy feels you've been looking for, go ahead and get it but first choose five other things to get rid of. Things that just take up space. Things you don't even notice anymore because they've kind of just blended into the walls. Get rid of that stuff!
I am terrible at not bringing new things home. My mom is the same way. I love new things! But at the same time, I love to throw things out and make space for the new fun stuff.
If you've got six throw blankets on your family room couch and you've got four people in your family, maybe toss out the two you don't all reach for first. If you've got five can openers and some work but some not so much, say goodbye to the lame ones that you have to fight with in order to get a darn can of tomato sauce open! All those containers that no longer have a matching lid? Bye bye!! And if your kids, like all kids, have hundreds of toys they don't look at or play with - have them give those suckers an adios!!
3. Create the happy.
Get yourself some indoor plants! Plants not only add a pop of fresh color and beauty to a room but also provide some health benefits. While they're sitting pretty they're actually hard at work - releasing oxygen and absorbing carbon dioxide. Plants freshen up the air around you and eliminate harmful toxins. Think fresh, green and clean!
Be visual. If the color yellow makes you happy do more yellow! Start with the room you're in the most. You don't need to spend a fortune adding color to a space. Find small touches, be it in the form of a throw pillow, blanket or a cool new piece of artwork and bring in the colors that give you a sense of calm and joy. Just remember to make space for it by getting rid of something else first!
The sense of smell. The most primal and mysterious of our six senses. Fragrances have the ability to bring on both positive and negative feelings - in like, milliseconds! If I smell last night's dinner in the trash I can guarantee I'm going to freak out! Sometimes that means I have to tell my family, loud and clear, that someone needs to take the trash out while I'm cleaning up the kitchen. Sometimes it means while the kids are doing homework and my husband is walking the dogs it's on me to get the trash out. Either way, I know the trash must get out before I lose it! Same goes for good smells. I love diffusing essential oils. My favorite is doTerra...a toss up between Serenity, Deep Blue and Melaleuca. If you have pets and you can't stand the way their food smells it's time to find a new place to store it, a better place to serve it and something better to store it in! Might take some minor rearranging but it'll be more than worth it when you walk into your kitchen and your first thought isn't OMG why do I smell the gross cat food?! If every time you walk by some fresh jasmine you take a deep inhale and try to hold onto that delicious fragrance and the way it makes you feel...it's time to plant some jasmine in your yard or maybe find a jasmine essential oil that you can diffuse or even carry around with you anytime you need a boost of happy feels!